Day 11

Got her some Diet RC Cola, "Ew, that's generic", unimpressive vanilla pudding, but liked the Vegetable Soup. Got her some Diet RC Cola, "Ew, that's generic". Was unimpressed with hospital vanilla pudding. But liked the Vegetable Soup. Mandy Visited and Melissa melted. Found out Melissa has blood clots (DVTs), that'll help sleeping. We started discussing moving her to rehab (release). And I'm still a little wrecked on the whole thing. ℹ️ Info           Created: 2023-02-28

2023-02-28 (Tuesday) She starts the day uncomfortable. She's used to movement, and frustrated.

• Diet Cola We were able to give her some Diet RC Cola. And her first words were, "Ew, that's generic"... all she wanted was a Pepsi. Later I smuggled her in a Diet Coke (they didn't have Pepsi), she thought that tasted like generic too. So it might be her taste buds are a little outta whack.

• Food Since she was on the path to eating food, she said "Food".
  I replied with my usual, "Where do you want to eat?"...
  and got her usual, "I don't know"...
  so I quipped, "Jersey Mike's?" An inside joke, as I love it, she doesn't. By picking it (sincerely), she has to pick somewhere else.
  She went, "Eew! And laughed".
  She tried vanilla pudding (the closest thing to vanilla icecream that she wanted) and was unimpressed.
  Later, she got vegetable soup hand spooned to her by Saint Mandy, and snarfed it down.

• Saint Mandy Her friend Mandy visited, and does girl/mom things like washes her face with a washcloth. Or calls me when Melissa asks. I'd been there most of the day, and she still seems to love hearing my voice. (As I love hearing hers). But attention from Mandy works pretty well too. Like feeding her as the picture shows.

• DVT Normally, I'm talking to the doctors and they are each talking pretty well about their areas. The exception is that nobody told me about the fact that she has DVT's in both arms (I had to read it going through tests/notes). Which explains some of the pain, weakness. There's not much you can do but let them disolve on their own (they already have her on blood thinners).

Release

They are starting to both reach out about possible release and where she can go for therapy. I asked a bit more about that, as she doesn't seem ready, and they were like, "no just preparing for someday", then they didn't give me any useful information. Then the doctors came in and were saying that there's still a long ways to go. (Good in that I want her a bit more self sufficient before she comes home).

They were asking about outpatient (1 hr/day PT), or in-patient (with 3 hrs), and I was assuming the latter -- as I know her, she'd put in the time and wants to get better faster. But then again, I know she wants to be home and back to her life. (She tells me that daily). I'm hoping there's a hybrid she can get up to, where she's in home, but we take her to day-care, and she can work more than just 1 hour.

• Progress Every day is a little progress (and some things that scare us, as we want her where she was at before this).

1. She has her wits and humor, and remembers stuff (like her Mom quizing her on everyone's birthdays).
2. Her voice is getting stronger. And she's starting to be able to shift/scooch herself in bed a bit. She holds her head up, etc.
3. We started physical therapy today -- and she will try to do whatever is asked. She was able to stay sitting up on the end of the bed. Help do leg lifts, and with work extend her arms, especially when I told her if she doesn't, she'll get bat wings (she's been holding them in, boxers defensive position). I think that's a body reflex to heal.
4. She has no problems any more holding her head up, looking around, and looking up (she also tends to keep her chin tucked).

Concerns

Being a husband (or Mom), it's still scary to us to see how weak, frail, and her brain took a big hit (between CPR, Drugs, Induced Coma, ICU Dementia, and lack of movement). It's similar to a stroke victim. But you just live in the moment, and keep taking baby steps forward

1. Her mood control isn't great.
2. Short term memory is getting better, but has gone from 15 minutes to about a day (doesn't remember yesterday).
3. She just wants to come home, and her life back, and to do the things she used to do, "Help me to the bathroom", "Take me home", "Help me walk the floor". And you keep watching with heartbreak, that she can't.
4. There's also some confusions on whether she can see. She keeps saying "can't see", and isn't focusing on you/etc... then she seems to respond like she can see shapes and colors at least. But couldn't read someone's badge up close. So lots more to explore there.

We don't know how much is short, mid or long term damage -- and how much it'll take to get back. That's terrifying, because I know how fiercly independent she is, how important communications are to her, and how go-go she is. But while the dark pit of worry sneaks up on me, I try to remember to just live like the Samurai. The Samurai would go insane if they lived in the future and remembered that they were going to die being chopped up by a 4' razor blade. The future is dark and unknown, so they learned to live in the moment. Now is good. And with Melissa, now is good. When I look at where she was a week ago, she was just coming out of a Coma and getting to the good hospital. Now she's talking -- even if it's going to take speech therapy for a while. She was nearly dead, now she's starting physical and occupational therapy, and starting to scooch herself around a bed.

• Support I need support too. And got help from Debi (Melissa's longest friend), who was caregiver to her Dad (stroke victim). And Melissa's Cousin (Julie), who ran the nurses in a stroke ward. Hypoxia isn't a stroke -- but some of the symptoms and therapies are similar -- but outcomes are often better, which is very inspirational.

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